I think we all have more friendly acquaintances than anything else. I have very few 'friends' and am okay with that. I consider myself a low maintanance friend. I don't need much, don't ask for much save the occasional get together. I have always been the 'funny' one, the one who 'still parties' after all these years - and yes , I am all those things. I am loyal and true. I have no patience or tolerance for weakness, snivelling and neediness. But, I have the 'tell it like it is' gene. As I always say - with me...it might not always be pretty, but it will always be real. I tend to take the sometimes wrongful stance of "Ready, shoot , aim!" then ask for forgiveness when sometimes I should have asked for persmission. Gotta work on that.
Why I bring this up is for two reasons....
1) April 10th marked 90 days (or 3 months, or 1/2 a school year, or 1/4 a calendar year ) that my dad died. The sting is not as sharp these days, but it is there nonetheless.
I remember my Dad telling me, on the occasion of his 40th birthday, that if you can count your true friends on the fingers of one hand (see above for definition of true friend) that you a lucky person indeed.
2) As I passed the mark of my own 40th (c'mon now, not too far passed the mark), and having given so many up so many of my own organs of late, I am starting to take stock of my precious fingers (and toes, and knees, and spleen, and earlobes) with more tolerance and hopefully less cynicism than ever before.
In the past several few months Hubby and I have had friends: battling their own personal demons, health issues, ailing parents, ailing children, flailing marriages, failed marriages. I have become aware of my own mortality and fragility...acutely aware, in fact. And, whereas in the past, I would fluff these types of things off or attribute these 'behaviors' to weakness - or bad decisions...I am hoping now that my personal epiphany has made me a 'kinder, gentler' cynic.
Maybe now my usually 1/2 empty glass view of the world is not just 1/2 empty, but 1/2 of it has been consumed and the rest is there to swirl and savor. To be enjoyed with one of my friends!
I hope that somebody out there counts me as a finger (probably the middle one, heh-heh).
To quote a famous movie line "Mama always said, Stupid is as stupid does." I hope someone wants to get stupid with me.