Wednesday, August 26, 2009

The One in Which She's Feeling Lucky

I am going.

I am going to win.

I am going to win big.

Because that's how I roll.

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Go Big or Go Home.

the Whrrl people got together with the SITStas and are offering a trip to Vegas to attend the SITScation '09. Oh I am so there.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Support Swirl Girl

I don't like to ask...but I have seen this amazing community of bloggers come together for so many things...Here's mine :

Please support my Reasons To Relay. Thanks in advance.

If you feel so inclined, click on the link above which should zip you over to my personal page. Then, look on the right side for the 'thermometer' and click on Make A Gift in Support link.

You'll find out lots of juicy things about me, like why I am doing this and Swirl Girl's real name.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

The One in Which She Was Not All Talk

It's the new me? (notice the punctuation...full of disbelief and self-doubt as usual)

Two things specifically illustrate my new All Action, No Talk* personal strategy. I know - hold on to your shit, now. This is Swirl Girl afterall, not some alien uber-Mommy who has taken over your beloved snark-filled-glass-half-empty bloggy friend. So rest assured there is a caveat or two**

I've been doing this blogging thing for about a year and a half. Along the way, I've met some really cool people. Two of the first (and consistent) virtual visitors here were Mariah and Chris. I've been following their lives and their ups and downs (and there have been many of both). We've talked about getting together before, but to be honest - I was the one who never acted on it. Mariah had even noticed a particular beach on a few posts of mine that we love. We've talked about meeting at the beach...but never did. This time - we made a date. And I acted a grown-up and we finally met at the beach!! She and Chris in tow with their 2 kids and their 4 friends. Me and my two girls. It was hard enough for me to summon up the courage to go, much less meet these guys after huffing and puffing hauling a chair, three towels, sand toys and a cooler the 214 miles from the parking lot to the spot by the rocks. I wish I had some real juicy story to tell...but it was just a really nice day with some really nice people. Who woulda thunk it? I don't think we all would have connected in our real lives had we all not been bloggers. We are all so different , yet we found a commonality.

{{introspective aside}}

In my own little corner (in my own little chair)*** of the internet, I can be whatever I want to be. In this - the unreality - my world is whatever I choose it to be. If I met someone live, I would have no keyboard or monitor to shield me. Thoughts like "What if they don't like me?" "What if I don't like them?" "Where's my out?" "Do I have a booger hanging out of my nose?"**** swirl through my head in most social situations. Just ask hubby. I am a chronic avoider.

{{end aside}}

Well, I am glad to report that after 4 1/2 hours of getting to know one another's real reality -there was nary the booger to be found. We chatted about blogs, life, stuff, junk, kids, relationships, backgrounds. All in all - it was a good first date. And if they ask me out again ...I'll go.

the kids set up a chat circle, climbed the rocks, boogie boarded, and played in the water for hours. Mariah's girls are gorgeous - scary gorgeous. and nice girls, too.

It's hard to get a good picture when one is all squinty and one of our boobs are hanging out. That's what my life has come to - in addition to everything I have to worry about armpit cleavage.

Swirl Girl (damn, still squinty) , Tent Camper and Manic Mariah

* Because "Leave me the fuck alone" didn't fly with the other PTA ladies Which leads me to the second illustration of this new found attitude of mine. I was sucked into the vortex elected to be PTA President this school year which is surprising since it is a known fact that I don't like most people's kids and I am not a 'meet and greet' sort. I have to come up with a theme. I went with It's All Good but seriously passed Leave Me the Fuck Alone by the Board.

** this whole new approach in no way means yes to anything clawed or furry or remotely pet- like invading my space. Okay, so the soon-to-be 10 year old wants a turtle. She wants one (and I quote) that is "small enough to hold but too big to flush". Maybe a newt. I'll think about a newt.

And don't think I'm gonna start making those icky little play dates for my kids or anything as drastic as that. I've still got my principles.

***Leslie Anne Warren as Cinderella circa 1965...which I think only me and my sisterbestfriend ever saw and still sing (courtesy of and my memories).

****real or virtual - in fact that's a great metaphor , blog post or blog title

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Imagination Station

So I am spending a lot of time this summer listening to my girls play. And I love to hear their imaginations at work.

{cue wavy, squiggly lines and flashback music}

... I am 6 and playing Partridge Family in Barbara Nappy's garage.- I always had to be Keith. She always got to be Laurie because she had long , straight hair. We were trapped in an abandonded mining town on our way to a performance at a retirement home and we'd sing "Point Me (in the direction of Albuquerque)" and if I was lucky, I'd get to strum the broom guitar or jangle the beach-pail full-of-shells tambourine...but she always got be the cool girl and I always had to be the guy. Or worse - I'd have to be Ruben.

{end scene}

The little one has always created scenarios by which the Polly Pockets or dinasaurs or combination of both are in perilous situations; dangling over a precipice or walking a plank...She loves to construct and build and has many things like Lego's and magnet thingies and TinkerToys and Ello's. She seems oblivious to the fact that anyone is listening because she uses her regular squeaky voice and doesn't play in a whispery tone. I love that about her. And when one of the little creatures is hanging upsidedown from a string attached to a make-shift 'yardarm' held fast by a two pillows resting on a blanket covering a table surrounded by a vast network of Lego's and buildy things., she uses a particularly higher pitched squeaky voice that only dophins and dogs can hear. If I stop and look at her, she stops - no she jumps as if she was busted with her hand in the proverbial cookie jar. I have tried to capture this on film ...but she is not a mugger for the camera like her big sister.

When the big one and the little one get together , it plays like a scene from any number of Disney channel tweener shows. She and the little one play Barbies or whatever and recreate the characters. When they play they always start the dialogue with "pretend you said blah,blah, blah" or "pretend you said yada, yada" and then they say whatever it is they were pretending to say. I say to them " Just say what your character is going to don't have to say "pretend " first. Just do it.

{{cue more Flashback music and squiggly , wavy lines}}

Playing with Jodi in my room. We played "I Dream Of Genie" -( 'cuz we couldn't twitch our noses like Samantha and Tabitha and it's just as well, because if we did...she'd always be Samantha and I would always have to be Serena, the evil twin cousin ), because we could cross our arms and "Boiing" and jump from twin bed to twin bed and tuck our shirts up and put jewels in our bellies. Jodi had long blonde hair so naturally she was always Jeannie and I, with my dark hair had to be the evil sister, Jeaney , who was always trying to steal the 'real Master' away from her.

We didn't say 'pretend Major Nelson is trapped in the bottle by evil twin sister and Jeannie has to figure out a way to get him out. We just did it. Major Nelson was trapped in the bottle...We didn't say "pretend you say 'Oh Master and you Boi-yoi-yoing him out.' We just Boi-yoi-yoinged him out, then would make-out with our pillows and....

{{ end scene}}

I don't get what happened to imaginations. Are kids these days so overloaded with media that they can't just play without writing an entire screenplay complete with script and stage direction? Just yesterday they made their own Vlog -That they even know what the hell it is is mind boggling. But there was an episode of Suite Life (on Disney channel of course) where some one had a webcast, so it goes without saying that they is how they came up with the idea. I usually wouldn't do this because they use real names and if this winds up on some Craig's list adoption site or something I'll hunt you down- but here it is. Eat your heart out Nancy Grace.

Almost live and almost in person on the their own Imagination Station.

And they didn't say "Pretend" once. They just did it.

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Dear So and So....

Dear 5;

You suck. You stole my kid. What happened to my go -anywhere-and- do -anything- without any- questions- asked daughter? Now she's all "Mo-o-0hmmm" whenever we ask her to do something. Her new found little 'tude is pushing my buttons to no end. And the tears. Oh, the tears.

I blame you 5. And all those frickin' books that teach how to be all 'I'm a big girl now'. She now poops and knows Everyone else does - so enough already. Goody. I know it's hard to be you, 5, we've been telling her that for almost 6 months now. But cut the crap.

Dear Migraine;

While I do enjoy the occasional flashback, those trippy little sparkly wavy thingies around my field of vision without benefit of the Grateful Dead's 'Box of Rain' on in the background when I'm driving are a bit much. I could understand if you visiting if I had porked out on oysters , smoked meats and chocolate - but I didn't even get to do that. It's not all bad... I do appreciate you knocking me out at 8:30 last night. Thirteen hours of sleep will do a body good.

Dear Lottery;

I could use a winning ticket. Just sayin'.

Dear Interesting Things to Blog About;

Where've you been? Just askin'.

Sincerely Yours ~

PS.. I got this from Mama Cass who got it from Kat.