Monday, August 18, 2008

The One With Hubby's Olympic One Liners

Hubby was on fire last night - snappy one liners flying off the couch like air pellets from the heptathaloner's rifle (if that is even part of a heptathalon...'cuz if it is, they don't show it on NBC).

Here are a few of his best:

"Olympic trampoline competition- this isn't sports, it's circus training. The trainers are wearing unstructured suede boots ...and I don't trust anyone in unstructured suede boots. Fucking carnies."



"Javelin color commentary guy - it's H.E.I.G.H.T not H.E.I.G.T.H...there is not 'th' at the end of the word. And, do we really need the coach to be 'miked' from the sidelines? Do ya think he is saying what he really wants to say or what he was told to say. All coachy like and "good try" and shit like that."



"The still rings...as opposed to what - swinging rings? The flying fire rings? Duh- of course they are still rings."

"Italy - guy, Matter Morandi, better hurry...got to tape the new season of Law and Order...he's really Christopher Meloni."



"Women's hurdles. Sport or Apt Metaphor?"


"Jamaican's run for the ganja...or 'cuz they shot the sherrif."

When he can get a word in edgewise, they are usually good ones.


12 comments:

M said...

WOW!! I'll sit next to him on the couch anyday. I'd have fallen off laughing.

Fannie Mae said...

The fact that he used the phrase "unstructured suede boots" may indicate he needs to get out with he guys more. I'm just sayin'. ;)

sassy stephanie said...

Sounds like you guys need to host Olympic viewing parties with hubby as the headliner.

Kat said...

I have not been watching a lot of the Olympics. I actually don't watch a lot of TV anyway. But...it is usually on. And I can hear it from the kitchen where I am doing my domestic duties (ie blogging). And I just couldn't believe I heard color commentary on the trampoline. Since when is that an Olympic event? Ya'll really should have viewing parties!

HappyHourSue said...

Hubby needs his own blog. The Dad Blogger is very up-and-coming right now.

Claudious said...

Absolutely love his olympic one liners, I have to say, I'm not engrossed in the competition, I'd probably like it a lot more watching it with someone who could keep up with me for sarcasm and bite.

Cristin said...

We're married to the same man... or men who would get along famously anyway.. too funny....

"HEIGTH" has always driven me crazy...

Colleen said...

that is hilarious! my hubby has barely watched the games...got his nose buried in his laptop. So even my semi-snarky remarks are lost. ;)

and I definitely agree with him: you just can't trust anyone in unstructured suede boots.

Tiffany said...

You need to video that...he is cracking' me up!

Christine said...

Lol - hubby should apply to be the commentator for the 2012 olympics. I am guessing the ratings would be through the roof!

Helena said...

Very funny!!

Paige said...

I am starting to wonder if we are married to the same thing. He made the same crack about the Jamaicans....now granted, he has an absurd bias against the entire island, but it was still funny